Fear and Doubt=Motivation
April 14,
2013 by Angela
Have not blogged since my Occupy Department of Veterans Affairs
participation. That trip to DC that was
well worth my time. Since that time Debs and I have Gone Back to New York to
get married at the same quaint little bed & breakfast Debs and I stayed at
when I was getting the boat and crew ready to row across the Atlantic on Big
Blue. For those new to my adventurous life, Big Blue was the first ocean rowing
catamaran and was built on Shelter Island.
I took delivery of the ocean rowing boat I will be rowing to Hawaii and
have been working to prepare the boat and myself for my solo row to Hawaii. Do
I have fears about weather I will be able to make such a journey? You Bet! I
have fears and doubts every time I set out to row an ocean. I was speaking at
an elementary school and one of the questions from a young girl was “Do you get
scared?” I immediately responded No and I have regretted saying that ever since
because it isn’t true. I certainly don’t want anyone to think I am afraid of
anything but I also don’t want people getting the impression that people who
accomplish what I accomplish have to be fearless. Fear & doubt is a big
part of what motivates me to try and is normal. It helps drive me to succeed and
makes me train and prepare to accomplish what most people consider impossible. I
fear failure but am not afraid to do extremely difficult things. I simply train
hard and prepare. I’ll make a 110% effort for a chance at either succeeding or
failing while being scared shitless the entire time. Most people consider what
I do crazy. People have a difficult time grasping the concept of the harshness
of life at sea for so much time for anyone let alone a paraplegic with rods in
her back. I will be 53 when I set off on this one and I feel every bit of those
53.
This being my first solo will make it the most difficult physical and
mental challenge since my hospitalization and surgeries. This row is taking
place in the USA and not half way across the world so organizations in the USA
such as Shared Adventures, The Northwest Regional Paralympic Sport clubs of
Sacramento, Santa Cruz, Menlo Park and Monterey, the VA hospital and others are
organizing the departure while I train and prepare the boat. I am rowing a solo
but I have much more land support than I have ever had in my entire life, I am
not alone on this one…many are interested, many will be following online and
the departure will be amazing. The arrival in Hawaii may be the most
significant celebration in the history of ocean rowing. I want to thank
everyone for their support and for liking the dedicated Facebook page- Military
& Veteran Tribute Row
